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Here is a nice CV story that Eugene sent me from a June 24th article in the Toronto Star:

G28 THE TORONTO STAR Saturday, June 24, 2000

Ford still makes big beasts From the Pre-metric Age

St. Thomas-made Crown Victoria and Grand Marquis have Loyal following:
By MARK TOL.JAGIC

Caution: poorly constructed analogy ahead.

Crown Victoria and its sibling, the Mercury Grand Marquis, are like those bug-eyed fish with bad overbites that occasionally get hauled up from the bottom of the Pacific Ocean in trawler nets, whose ancestors can be traced back to the Stone Age.

With their body-on-frame construction, V8 engines and split bench seats, these modem-day dinosaurs are direct descendants of the LTDs and Meteors that roamed North America in the days paleontologists call Pre-metric.

To appease police and taxi fleets, Ford resisted giving its largest car a front-wheel drive makeover. Those people who steadfastly believe a front wheel drive car doesn't have the mettle to take the abuse that a constable, for example, might mete out (tall curbs at a Tim Hortons drive-through are unforgiving).

Ford's big cars have been around since the term "full-size" was coined. The Crown Victoria moniker was dusted off after a 30-year absence (LTD was the interim nomenclature). Meanwhile, the Mercury division practised self-restraint by politely ignoring journalists' requests to market a "de Sade" trim level for its Marquis.

We'll restrict our review to the most contemporary Ford/Mercury models, which arrived in early 1991 as '92s. A mild restyling for the 1998 model year included enough running-gear improvements to qualify them as a new half-generation.

Both the Crown Vic and Grand Marquis are assembled exclusively at the St. Thomas plant, south of London.

CONFIGURATION

For 1992, the Ford/Mercury pair received a complete renovation (the previous generation had been around since 1979), starting with an aero smooth body that earned a commendable 0.34 coefficient of drag.

Sadly, this imperative brought to an end the long-running wagon, leaving the four-door sedan as the only body type (the two-door expired in 1988). The old 5.0 L V8 was dumped in favour of a 4.6 L SOHC V8 - an all-new modular engine design that was both more powerful and fuel-efficient. It had debuted in the Lincoln Town Car (which uses the same platform) a year earlier.

Exquisitely smooth and quiet - one auto journalist admitted trying to start the car twice while it was already running - this engine developed 190 hp with a single exhaust and 210 (later, 215) with twin tailpipes.

An electronic four-speed automatic transmission was standard equipment, although early 1992 models were equipped with a hydraulically controlled shift mechanism.

ABS brakes and traction control were available as options from the outset.

Given its popularity with police departments, Ford offered an extensive handling package to civilians, too. It included a shorter final-drive ratio (for quicker launches), more aggressive tires, a fatter rear anti-roll bar, stiffer shocks and springs, and even air springs at the rear axle with automatic load leveling.

ON THE ROAD

Equipped with the handling package and 2 10 hp engine (making 270 lb- ft of torque), a 1992 Crown Victoria pulled to 100 km/Hr in 9.5 seconds- good, but nowhere near performance-car territory. And this in spite of the fact Ford kept the Vicky's weight down to a reasonable 1,800 kg. The hood, for example, is aluminum in place of steel.

With the optional package, the big Ford could haul itself down from 120 km/h to a standstill in 58 m - not bad for a fat cat. The four-wheel disc brakes were criticized, however, for poor balance, resulting in the tendency for the rear end to come around under hard braking.

The optional 16-inch performance tires allowed the Vicky to circle a skid pad with 0.81 g of lateral force - definitely in the sporty car neighbourhood.

Unfortunately, the overboosted power steering communicated little road feel. The suspension was characterized as imprecise; hit a bump in a turn and the rear end steps out disconcertingly.

The 1998 and later models added a Watt's linkage for the rear axle to address this problem.

WHAT OWNERS SAID

Apparently, rear-wheel drive has become the object of a not-so-secret cult. "Why rear drive is unpopular is beyond me. Our traction-assisted Crown Vic gets around as well (or better) than front drive cars during inclement weather," one adherent provided as testimony.

"I drive a Mazda 626 to work, but on the weekends we roll out Ford ... we have been broadsided twice in that car got and nobody got hurt - it's built like a tank! " wrote another on the internet.

Most owners defend their preference for a body-on-frame, rear-wheel drive car and, in the same sentence, resented being characterizes as spin sters or the ultimate: men-with-hats.

Ouch.

"At 40 years of age, I probably don't fit the typical buyer profile for this car. While not as trendy as owning an SUV or import, the Marquis is a nice, affordable alternative," commented Ted Smith.

Now that gasoline is more dear owners brought out their calculators: "On my annual trip to Florida, I get 15 mpg with the trailer and 29 without," wrote Ross Rodgers.

Others reported similar mileage on-the open road.

In terms of reliability, the big Ford and Mercury have their share of problems, but it seems their fans are willing to put up with some aggravation just to remain members of the club.

Early examples were known for their transmission problems, particularly the torque converter.

Owners suggested keeping a close eye on the transmission fluid and changing it both at designated intervals (50,000 km) and when it becomes discoloured.

Two frequent sources of complaints were the power-assisted windows and the spark-plug wires.

"It's to the point that I'm afraid to use them - all four windows have been repaired in the last 12 months," wrote one owner.

Another pins the blame on the nylon spool that breaks and tangles around the regulator and motor inside the door, breaking both. Expect to pay $300 or more per episode.

The spark-plug wires have a notoriously short life and are unusually expensive. Early models (1992-93) also had a starter "trigger" wire that was prone to corrosion; an improved wire was later engineered and can be retrofitted, according to reader Dr. J. D. Robinson.

Other weaknesses included poor air conditionong , faulty daytime running lights modules and periodic buzzes, creakes and rattles.

Still, enough drivers wrote to say that their Crown Vic or Grand Marquis is was one of the best vehicles they have ever owned, earning this Canadian-made contemporary land yacht one thumb up.

And, just so you know there are worse metaphors out there, we leave you with these unfortunate words, posted on the Internet by someone who tried to convey the sense of security they had from driving a full-frame car: 'Feels like a womb on the high-way".

Mark Toljagic, a freelance Toronto writer contributes 'Second-hand' every other Saturday.

Send your letters and comments to:

'Second-hand', c/o Wheels section, Toronto Star, One Yonge St., Toronto, M5E 1E6. Fax 416-865-3996. E-mail: mailto:toljagic@idirect.com

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